I am getting a C in physics. I cried. I know you are all laughing at me, but the truth is I cried really hard. It’s not just that I am type A, or that I am a control freak, but I think I am trying to prove myself –mostly to myself. Throughout the process of med school pursuit I have felt like an underdog. First because I chose nursing first and that tends to confuse people. Why would you do med school? Why not do nurse practicioner? etc, etc, blah, blah, blah. So, in this whole process I have correlated in my mind my grade = my chance at getting in to a program. There may some truth the fact that my grades do matter. But one physics class??? It can’t matter THAT much. Even if it does matter, there’s not much that I can do about it. All this angst. It has prompted me to think about my view of success. I seem to equivocate success with tangible things (i.e. grades, promotions, money) — a very american thought indeed. Although I hardly believe that to be the true definition, and I am sure my stay-at-home-parent friends would agree.
Here’s to: taking a deep breath, maintaining perspective and not giving a shit.
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I’m really good at not giving a shit. I keep reminding my sister of my achievement philosophy: Aim Low. It’s very helpful when there’s lots of small humans involved–or just your own big ego. Aim low, Katherine, you’ll feel better about achieving anything at all. And then you can enjoy the process of achieving.
Sincerely,
Guru Alishia
And PS: Dammit, why am I not on your “Friends” list over on the side?
i say aim for what you want, not what others want…so that might look low.
you will end up with an A. But if you don’t, don’t beat yourself up about it. You did more than 90% of the world, by taking the class in the first place.
thanks. the only way I am getting an A is if I can hack into the grades and change mine.
but i will give it a valiant effort. the hacking, that is.
As a fellow Type-A’r, I understand. The B’s on my transcript still give me the creeps. because that’s what non-A grades are: CREEPS. But we must learn to let them not creep us out…. but is so hard, because they are so curvy and blighted, not like the erect and crisp “A” that we really want to receive.
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